Dear Jackie, how I can empathise with the experiences you've described here.

I find it interesting in a way. When I've finished going through the emotional range of upset, indignant and enraged.

I spent most of my life underweight - that was equally always commented upon, but I never encountered that assumption of a low IQ or constant blindness to my long-term conditions which has made an appearance with the large amount of weight I've gained over the past few years.

I've also noticed a difference between the reception I get myself and the way my partner is treated. He is disabled and has a long-term illness himself. I've been his main carer for thirteen years now (which is difficult given my own situation). When I take him to the doctor, pushing his wheelchair and advocating for him, I see not only a difference in the way the doctors look straight to his health problems with no comment on his weight, but also (bizarrely) in the way they treat ME. As my partners carer and advocate I appear to be awarded with an assumption of higher intelligence - many of the health professionals we see on a regular basis seem to treat me as almost on a level footing with themselves, as a partner in discussing my partners care and medical treatment.

I can see a difference in how I am treated vs how he is treated being down to inherent assumptions built into a sexist, unequal society.

The second difference threw me though, I've got to admit it.

Here's hoping you get someone thoughtful and responsive who will listen to and help you when you go for you pain specialist appointment Jackie.

Thank you for sharing this with us here at Counter Arts - Sadie